Picture this: a day without the relentless demands of motherhood—no school runs, no meal-prepping, and no kids in sight. Imagining this well-deserved “me time” already makes me feel guilty, but it’s fun to picture being selfish sometimes. You don’t get to be selfish as a mum.
Now, toss in unlimited cash and guilt-free spending, and you’ve got me dreaming up the ultimate fantasy day. Can a single mum revel in pure self-indulgence? Follow me as I unveil the secrets of my kid-free fantasy in my favourite city. Any guesses where we are going?
We are jetting off in first class to Dubai! It’s my favourite city, filled with memories from my pre-kids era. But here’s the twist: My partner in crime won’t be the usual suspects. Sorry, Mum! No raised eyebrows at my shopping splurges, no unsolicited advice on men (we all know what mums are like—sometimes they whine more than the kids!). Instead, I’m taking only my single girlfriends. You know, the kind who hasn’t signed up for the marriage or boyfriend commitment package. It’s all about keeping it hassle-free. My everyday life has enough drama as it is!
After a well-deserved lie-in at our five-star hotel (let’s face it, catching up on sleep is an eternal struggle in motherhood), my dream day kicks off in true Dubai fashion: With a shopping spree that would make any seasoned shopaholic blush. While my wardrobe is already full of items from the brands I collaborate with, today’s shopping list is reserved for pure luxury. Louis Vuitton bags? Absolutely. Designer trainers? Well, a girl has got to have her collection.
Even though this is fun to imagine, it’s hard to shake off a tinge of guilt for spending this much imaginary money on myself. Shouldn’t I be spending it on my kids? Usually, that’s where all my money goes. The motherhood shame of being selfish is real. There is constant judgement and pressure that we are supposed to give up our pre-kids lives if we want to be labelled a good mum. Think about yourself for once? Oh no! How terrible!
My remedy for this guilt is to dream of buying jewellery engraved with their birth dates and names. I actually already have lots of jewellery like this in real life. Sentimental necklaces and bracelets that remind me of what I’m most proud of – my amazing children – feel like a mum-approved treat. It’s still about my kids, so it’s permitted without judgement. In truth, I might fantasise about a day without them, but they’re always on my mind, even amid self-indulgent shopping. It’s a mother’s instinct.
After relaxing and sunbathing at the beach, next on my dream agenda is a trip to Dubai’s most luxurious spas. I want massages that knead away the knots of motherhood, facials that erase years of sleepless nights, and a fresh hair wash and blow-dry. These are all simple luxuries that girls deserve but are overlooked in my reality. Juggling the kids, providing care for Oakley, managing my social media, and keeping on top of the house take up all my time. But on my dream day, I come first.
A few hours in the gym also make it to my dream day to-do list. I’ve always loved working out, but I took it for granted. Since having the kids, I must be in and out within an hour, constantly watching the clock. In Dubai, I’d take my time and enjoy in the gym, just like I used to. I might even have a go on the indoor ski slope for an exhilarating experience I can’t remember having in ages.
Where do you find me as the sun dips below the Dubai skyline? Not at a bar, reliving my party days. Motherhood really does change you, even in your dreams. Instead, I imagine myself lounging in the comfort of an exclusive rooftop spot, soaking up the panoramic view of the Dubai skyline at night with my fresh hair, makeup, and handbag. I’m feeling fantastic, and the thought of an attractive Dubai prince approaching me crosses my mind. I falter—even all glammed up, I don’t know how I would react.
Here is the truth: Despite the confident front on Instagram, I’m extremely shy. Sometimes, I even convince myself I’m talking to myself, even with 400K followers. Men seem to bring about an even more nervous version of myself. It’s no wonder—the past 18 months have been a rollercoaster of heartache, with numerous letdowns, particularly from men. It’s left me incredibly cautious when it comes to trusting them. The wounds run deep. I often question if I’ll ever let my guard down again, especially after being hurt by the one person I least expected it from.
You might be thinking, surely my dream day would include some romance? It’s completely missing from my everyday life, and I can imagine the perfect scenarios with the ideal person. But in reality, romance isn’t on the cards. What I want isn’t some fairytale. It’s about finding more “me time” to catch up on sleep, rediscover what I love, steal a moment for self-care, and connect with friends.
So, yes, I’d still splurge on designer stuff, leave my Mum at home (although she’s an unsung hero), and forgo wild parties. Call me boring, but to me, this dream day is about self-love, resilience, and the quiet strength that comes with being a mum. And honestly, although motherhood is hard, one day of relaxation is all I need. I can’t wait to get back to my babies.
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